How to Deal with a Boring Date
People go on dates to see whether or not they’d hit it off. In most cases, especially with younger couples, dating is simply a means for having fun and enjoying each other’s company. Successful first dates lead to invitations and acceptance of a second date. Unfortunately, not all dates turn out that way. Whether you’re male or female, one of the most dreaded dates is the boring date. Since “boring” can be relative, there are different ways to deal with them.
You define what “boring” is–not your friends
With young people, particularly teenagers, they place a high premium on their friends that it’s often their opinions that matter more. There’s nothing wrong with trying to please your friends, especially when it doesn’t raise legal or moral issues. Yet, if you let them define what’s good and not good for you, you could be resentful, snobby, and unhappy. People vary in terms of preference, which means that what could be boring for your friend could be really interesting to you. Don’t let what other people think pressure you in any way.
You may not be the only one who’s bored
Sometimes, going out on a date puts us on a one-sided trial where we play the jury. It’s so easy to get too caught up in thinking about the dating dos and don’ts that you may tend not enjoying the date. Worse, your date may appear boring, because he or she is simply reciprocating your actions. Dates usually have awkward starts, so cut your date some slack. Be more empathic and remember that he or she is also feeling some pressure to stick to “how to be the perfect date” tips.
You’ve officially rated your date as boring. Now what?
While people may have different concepts of what boring is (e.g., “talks about himself all the time,” “she and I don’t have the same interests”), it generally points to something predictable and uninteresting. Sometimes, people attract us because we don’t know that much about them. hen the mystery is unveiled, however, we find that there’s nothing so exciting about our date. What do you do? Stay gracious until the date is over. Try not to roll your eyeballs or lash out with sarcastic remarks.
Thank your date at the end, but don’t leave him or her with false hopes. Skip the harsh words and simply tell him or her that it’s just not working. Try turning the tables and imagine how you’d want to be treated. Who knows? Your date may be boring but he or she could turn out to be a great friend!
Dating is supposed to be fun and insightful, not pressure-laden or boring. Don’t listen too much to how other people rate their dates. What doesn’t work for them may work for you. Boring begets boring, so keep yourself interesting and interested. Give your date a break. Even if he or she is boring for real, remain a gracious date.
Photo Credit : bfelice
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