How to Deal with Being Left by Your Children for College
Several emotions come to fore once your child leaves for college. It is at this time that you normally begin feeling time – how much you’re child has grown up and the new life he or she faces. Often, the sense of pride that comes with your child’s achievements also brings with it a sense of dread. This new life that your child has may not need you around as much. You may feel your child slipping away from a life with you, a life you’ve gotten used to for so many years. This fear of “loss” is normal. Almost all parents deal with this one time or another.
A new life begins
When your child steps into college, it is not only he or she who has to deal with a new life. You have some issues to deal with too. There may be a sense of loss at first, the well-regarded empty nest syndrome. This is normal; and, as others have coped, you are bound to adjust to this too.
Slowly loosen the apron strings. Give your child the freedom that’s required for him or her to really learn what life’s about; and to find out who he or she really is and what he or she wants to do with his or her life. Your child deserves this. This is the time for him or her to explore experiences and relationships. And as always, be there for your child when needed. Listen and help out, if your child asks for it. Take this time for yourself too. While rearing your child, you might have put some hobbies and interests on the sidelines. It’s now time to bring them back into the limelight. Go on and get working on your garden, if that’s what you want. Join a cooking class or a dance class. Paint again. Take up knitting or learn a new language.
Communication and guidance
Despite this new life, keep in mind that your child may still need your guidance and help. Keep in constant communication with him or her. Email, text, or call when you can – although it’s best to keep this in an unobtrusive level as you won’t want to smother your child. Be there for him or her; and let your children know this: that you are there for them.
College is an exciting time for your child; and it can be an exciting and new life for you too. Embrace this new life and let your child enjoy his or her new found freedom.
Photo Credit : hapinachu
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Life is a never ending cycle of events. It’s like a very long script with several characters, settings and plot varies. At one point, you are the lead then you become the support.
Let’s start with you being a college student, you leave the nest and explore life’s possibilities on your own. Following that is meeting your would be life long partner, then marriage comes in. Before you know it, from couplehood, a big nursery is up ahead. Now let’s slow down a little. there you are cuddling and enjoying your drooling little one, singing her lullabyes and laughing to her every antics. Time to time, you pray that she’ll be bigger now so you can play and have fun with her. Then before you realized it, she’s headed to school and slowly she’s slipping through your fingers. From wanting to see her big, now what you have is fear. fear that she may not need you anymore since she’s grown exactly how you prayed she’ll be. Now, fast forward, she’s headed to college just as you were on the first part of the chapter. from fear, now you have anxiety. You are anxious why she’s grown so fast you didn’t even notice. Then again, another cycle has wheeled. Mixed emotions, varying, contrasting and conflicting, that’s what life is all about.